Well, I've gone and written a sonnet! Ever since I knew there was such a form, I wanted to try my hand, but I had to wait until I had something truly important demanding my attention for the right kind of procrastinatory energy to kick in. It's not the best sonnet ever -- in fact, in its own way it's pretty sucky. But somehow I'm proud of it anyway. Here it is:


I went to work at eight and left at five.
At night I had a beer and watched my shows.
Soon into dreams head-first I took a dive.
I hadn't even taken off my clothes.
When morning came of course I was erect.
And there, upon the couch, I loos'd my zip!
My stiffy I was honor'd to inspect
As spry it sprung from boxers' open lip.
A notion had come quick into my mind
To do what nature seem'd to ask of me.
I had no fear of time or going blind,
In waxing morning light I cried, “I'm free!”

And when at last I'd finished up the deed,
I went into the bathroom and I peed.